the flowers & the weeds

There's nothing quite like the start of a new day.

It can either hold sadness or hope & it's all up to you.

New days are a funny thing. They make you feel like you've got the chance to start all over again & make something good happen...you know, until reality hits & you're dealing with all the same stuff that you've been dealing with for some time now. 

But really, IT IS A BRAND NEW DAY! & you've got the choice to deal with "your stuff" with a new & refreshed attitude or a stale & worn-out attitude. Because your attitude is a choice. 

I never said it was easy. Emotions can be big, but they can be beat. & if they happen to win over you for a day, guess what...you get to wake up tomorrow & show them who's really boss. You win by never giving up! 

--- I was doing a bit of gardening the other day & because I had left it off too long the weeds had gained quite a lot of ground. Their roots were hard to pull out, & I needed a special tool to dig them out. At one point, I accidentally pulled out a plant & I was amazed at how easily it came out without having to dig...it's root wasn't nearly as strong as the weed. ---

What am I saying? 

Keep dealing with yourself! Never stop dealing with the hard things because the longer you let them go, the harder they get to pull up. 

Keep building up the good things in your life. Spend time daily with God & in His Word, pray, worship, give, communicate with godly people, etc. Take care of those good root systems & give them time to root themselves strong! 

You can't only take care of the flowers in your garden & let the weeds run wild, or else soon you'll have a bunch of dead flowers in a weed garden. 

Pour into your life spiritually & let God tend to your garden...the flowers & the weeds.

John 15 

1 “I am the true vine, and my Father is the vinedresser. 

2 Every branch in me that does not bear fruit he takes away, 

and every branch that does bear fruit he prunes, that it may bear more fruit. 

3 Already you are clean because of the word that I have spoken to you. 

4 Abide in me, and I in you. As the branch cannot bear fruit by itself, 

unless it abides in the vine, neither can you, unless you abide in me. 

5 I am the vine; you are the branches. 

Whoever abides in me and I in him, he it is that bears much fruit, 

for apart from me you can do nothing. 

making it

So it's been 2 days. 

We celebrated Abigail's 1st birthday on 5/26 & it was both happy & hard.

Honestly, I didn't handle it as masterfully as I had hoped. I could have easily spent all of the weekend curled up in bed & crying. That's just how I felt. (*makes me ever more grateful for a strong & supportive husband*)

But hey, guess what, I'm still here! I made it through. 

& hey guess what's more...

You're still here too! You've made it through today & yesterday & the day before that! 

I know sometimes the pain feels overwhelming & the future seems daunting, but we can't let ourselves get caught up in all of that. 

Don't let the battle make you forget how strong you've been & how far you've come.  

I remember so very clearly a message preached by one of the best, Mrs Zane Johnson. She preached on scars. & yeah they hurt, & yeah they take time to heal, BUT they also prove you're stronger than whatever you're facing. 

So even if your process has been messy, don't lose sight of the fact that you're making it. Let God continue to heal those hurt places. He can & He is & He will continue to.  

He is our hope & our strength. In the midst of the battle, we find our rest in Him.

Psalm 91
1 He who dwells in the shelter of the Most High will abide in the shadow of the Almighty. 2 I will say to the Lord, “My refuge and my fortress, my God, in whom I trust.” 3 For he will deliver you from the snare of the fowler and from the deadly pestilence. 4 He will cover you with his pinions, and under his wings you will find refuge; his faithfulness is a shield and buckler. 5 You will not fear the terror of the night, nor the arrow that flies by day, 6 nor the pestilence that stalks in darkness, nor the destruction that wastes at noonday. 7 A thousand may fall at your side, ten thousand at your right hand, but it will not come near you. 8 You will only look with your eyes and see the recompense of the wicked. 9 Because you have made the Lord your dwelling place— the Most High, who is my refuge— 10 no evil shall be allowed to befall you, no plague come near your tent. 11 For he will command his angels concerning you to guard you in all your ways. 12 On their hands they will bear you up, lest you strike your foot against a stone. 13 You will tread on the lion and the adder; the young lion and the serpent you will trample underfoot. 14 “Because he holds fast to me in love, I will deliver him; I will protect him, because he knows my name. 15 When he calls to me, I will answer him; I will be with him in trouble; I will rescue him and honor him. 16 With long life I will satisfy him and show him my salvation.” 

dedicated to my girl

Happy Birthday to my sweet little love. 

Abi Gwyn, you're the best of the best. You took our hearts & made them explode with love. The days we spent with you were beyond words. 

You were beautiful & strong & beyond sweet. We loved the moments we shared & we'll never forget. You will always be in our hearts.

You changed our lives forever & we're thankful we were chosen to be your mommy & daddy. 

We ache to be with you again & hope beyond hope to make you proud with this time we live apart. 

We know that God will use your life to touch the world around us. You have & will continue to change & affect people & bring them closer to Jesus. 

As much as we miss you, we're so happy for you to be with Him. We're so happy you get to be perfect & pain free. & we're so excited for the day when we will all get to be in His presence together. 

Until then, we'll be here... loving you big, living out the plans He has for us, sharing your story & His hope to this hurting world.  

xoxoxoxoxoxo forever

every. time.

Thinking about the book of Ruth today. 

The tragedy & triumph. 

It's a fantastic love story, but it was born out of real sorrow.

There is no heartbreak that the Father cannot recompense. 

Life won't always make sense or feel good, but if we continue to walk in obedience & have faith in God, He will make straight our crooked path. 

His faithfulness is boundless.

You might ask, if He is so faithful then why do bad things happen? I can't tell you why bad things happen, but I can tell you that I would rather have Him helping me in the aftermath than try to face it alone. He's the foundation that won't crumble no matter what I have to face. So I know that when the hard times end, I'll still be standing...not because I am strong, but because He is strong (2 Cor 12:9). It certainly takes the pressure off. 

Life comes to us all; it's our decision to walk through it with Him or alone. & I'll take Him every time. 

Isaiah 42:16 

And I will bring the blind by a way that they knew not; 

I will lead them in paths that they have not known: 

I will make darkness light before them, and crooked things straight. 

These things will I do unto them, and not forsake them.